Please Judge, No !
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Mike's Christmas Letters


Taken from Gaetane’s blog by Laura Napolli - 2010

This is an example of what I experienced with each of the following professionals involved in my case after my ex showed them photographs and his yearly Christmas letters:

Meri Nichols, my attorney

Mary Sean O’Reilly, the mediator

Kevin Burus, the attorney ad litem

Barbara Chase-Hopkins, school counselor

Sharon Gerber, therapist

CPS workers, and many more

I’m going to share my experience with Sharon Gerber to illustrate my point.

At one on my sessions with Ms. Sharon Gerber, LCSW, she told me how my ex had shown her photographs of himself and the children interacting beautifully together. He had also shown her his yearly Christmas letters that show all the awesome things him and the children had done together over the years. And how comfortable and loving they appeared with each other. Ms. Gerber told me that after seeing those she seriously doubted that Michael could be an abuser.

Comments like this made by Ms. Gerber confirmed that I was indeed dealing with an inadequate trained court professional. Ms. Gerber didn’t know it but by making this statement she had just proven to me that she had no experience and no training in DV.

Ms. Gerber just like the above-mentioned professionals just showed me that she hasn’t read the current research out there.

Current research says: Court professionals also may observe children interacting with their fathers without showing fear. Untrained professionals regularly conclude that this means the father could not possibly be an abuser. The children’s experience is that their father does not hurt them in front of witnesses.  So they are safe to have fun with the father when there is a third party in the room. Alternatively, the children could be punished if they showed fear in front of witnesses.

Plus anybody knowing a little bit about DV knows about “The Cycle of Abuse”. Perpetrators are known to take the camera out when they are in “The Honey Moon Phase.” 


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